An end-of-life doula is a companion to those approaching the end of their life. Their purpose is to be of service, without judgment, but with curiosity while honoring the spirit of their client. My work as an end-of-life doula is a natural extension of my life-long interest in change, as reaching the end of one’s life is our most profound transition.
End-of-life doulas can serve in many capacities. My area of focus is to be of service to clients and their loved ones by facilitating conversations with creative tools that will enhance their journey.
If helping is an experience of strength, fixing is an experience of mastery and expertise. Service, on the other hand, is an experience of mystery, surrender and awe. A fixer has the illusion of being causal. A server knows that he or she is being used and has a willingness to be used in the service of something greater, something essentially unknown. Fixing and helping are very personal; they are very particular, concrete and specific. We fix and help many things in our lifetime, but when we serve we are always serving the same thing. Everyone who has ever served through the history of time serves the same thing. We are servers of the wholeness and the mystery in life… I think I would go so far as to say that fixing and helping may often be the work of the ego, and service the work of the soul.
Excerpt from an essay by Rachel Naomi Remen, Noetic Sciences Review #37, Spring 1996
Additional Resources you might find of interest:
- Compassion and the true meaning of empathy. TedTalk by Joan Halifax https://www.ted.com/talks/joan_halifax_compassion_and_the_true_meaning_of_empathy?language=en
- Endwell is a non-profit on a mission to transform how the world thinks about, talks about and plans for the end of life https://endwellproject.org
- Stanford Medicine Letter Project https://med.stanford.edu/letter/friendsandfamily.html
- Being Mortal by Atul Gwande
Creating Matters 